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the quality of our relationships determines the quality of our lives

Esther Perel

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You are the expert of your life

The Challenge

My coaching is for any woman in a long-term relationship who has ever asked herself: Am I truly being heard? Why do I always have to think of everything? Who is really there for me? Why am I often so angry and exhausted at the same time? If I could change anything, what would I wish for? Where is my eroticism and how do I rekindle it? Is this all there is? What does my role as a woman/mother/partner mean? How do I find my way back to myself and my worth? Do you feel increasingly dissatisfied, misunderstood, or empty inside in your relationship? Many women experience the gradual loss of intimacy and passion fading over the course of a long-term partnership. In my coaching sessions, I encounter women who find themselves stuck in rigid relationship patterns. Issues like infidelity, breaches of trust, or power imbalances within the partnership can further shake the foundation of a relationship. Often, emotional, financial, or familial dependencies exist—making it difficult to make clear decisions. The full extent of toxic relationships is often only recognized with distance: recurring conflicts, manipulation, or the feeling of losing oneself. I support you in identifying these dynamics and finding a path to your personal freedom and self-determination. Especially during the midlife years and menopause many things change: the body, hormones, needs, and life goals. Issues like body image and loss of libido become more present, as do questions about emotional estrangement. These changes can exacerbate existing communication problems in a relationship. You might feel that you've become emotionally detached from your partner—a kind of romantic disengagement that often begins subtly and deepens over time. This wouldn't even be so bad if it weren't for societal expectations and a partner who doesn't understand. Frustration, guilt, and a sense of obligation take hold. The traditional nuclear family is increasingly dissolving and is often no longer truly suitable for modern relationships – divorce rates are high, and numerous statistics show that a large part of the population is clearly dissatisfied with the current status quo. Patriarchal structures are slowly crumbling.. Since we are all so highly individualized these days, it is impossible to subject people to a specific structure that dictates how they should organize their lives and meet their diverse needs. But how authentic and safe can we even talk about this when, statistically for women, the (ex) partner still remains one of the most dangerous people in their proximity, and many unrealistic expectations prevail on both sides regarding what this relationship is supposed to deliver, and over very long periods of time.

The Vision

The goal is for you to (re)discover your own emotional balance, strength and self-love to actively shape your life—within your existing framework or through renegotiation. The vision, in a broader sense, is nothing less than a paradigm shift in society, in how we love and care for one another in the 21st century—individually and as a whole. Every person, every entity, is challenged to examine their existing resources, their obstacles, their emotional history and constitution in order to find new paths to a more balanced division of care work and a freed up thinking about love and community within their own lives.

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who better than You could create the love and community exactly how you want

Vision
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owning the process

The Work

Individual. Trustworthy. Practical. My offer to you: In a non-judgmental safe space, you will truly be heard, taken seriously, and finally given the room to rethink love, family and community. We will strengthen your ability to communicate your needs clearly and powerfully. Together, we will explore how you can consciously activate your individual resources and your community to set boundaries and delegate tasks fairly. Care work should be negotiable on equal terms, and there are concrete tools for this. We will clarify your values and uncover patterns that are holding you back. You will learn to let go of what no longer serves you and gain new courage and confidence. At the same time, I will accompany you on your journey to reconnect with yourself, to slowly rediscover pleasure, and to allow it, step by step, without guilt or shame. The idea behind systemic coaching is based on the premise that you cannot tell people what to do, nor can you give them external advice that interferes with their internal logic. You can only offer them a safe space and the framework of active listening, asking systemic questions, and providing them with insights to help them tap into their own resources and develop their own unique and sustainable solutions independently and responsibly.

The Work
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not for everyone, but maybe for you

About Anika

She is a certified individual psychological coach and supervisor. Anika has been deeply entrenched in this field for almost 20 years and has developed into an expert through her own personal journey. She has intensively studied the three different brain systems activated during love, attachment, and eroticism; explored emotional attachment styles; investigated the 'erotic blueprint' (the rich, subconscious world of imagination and unspoken desires) that individually inspires each person; explored the dead ends, advantages, and problematic myths of monogamous relationships and female sexuality; and examined gender differences in the division of care work, mental and emotional load, and the many other challenges that modern love and relationships face today. Countless conversations with women and couples over the years, along with her own personal biography and experiences, have further solidified her passionate calling: to help bring about nothing less than a paradigm shift in society regarding how we love and care for one another in the 21st century – individually and as a whole. Her practice for in-person sessions is located in Munich-Au-Haidhausen, but she also offers online appointments. She speaks fluent English and German and can coach competently in both languages, especially intercultural couples with their unique challenges.

About Anika

Client Stories

Read for yourself what clients share about transformational experiences with Anika, highlighting the effectiveness of her coaching and showing what's possible.

Trustful Coaching with Real Depth

I felt safe and understood with Anika from the very beginning. Her empathetic and appreciative manner made it easy for me to open up – even about topics that were personally very sensitive or emotional for me. It was a safe space where I could say anything. I was particularly impressed by how she manages to provide genuine food for thought through targeted questions and attentive listening. I often gained new perspectives that helped me gain clarity and take concrete steps. The coaching sessions were not only professional but also very touching on a personal level. I didn't feel judged but rather seen – that was crucial for me. I highly recommend Anika's coaching – for anyone who wants to understand themselves better, question old patterns, and find new paths. ​ Viktoriya

Coaching, that moves and enriches

From the very first moment, coaching with Anika was characterized by her passionate, empathetic nature and professional demeanor. Her combination of professional expertise and genuine warmth created a safe space in which I felt completely comfortable and could open up, even on very personal, intimate, and emotional topics. Anika not only listens attentively, she also asks the right questions – questions that resonate, stimulate reflection, and open up new perspectives. I found the inspiration surrounding the topics of love, female role models, sexuality, and relationships particularly enriching. Through her guidance, I was able to gain clarity, gain new food for thought, and take the first step toward real change. Coaching whose impact extends far beyond the conversation. Janine

Transformative relationship coaching

As someone with rather traditional views on marriage and family building up until this point, I was skeptical at first if a coach could guide us through separation, communication issues surrounding our bi-cultural differences and re-building our family with two children after infidelity. ​ I have to say looking back at what I believed was not possible has really changed, and only time has really given me that perspective to allow for new possibilities. ​ Anika did a great job holding both of our individual experiences while mediating a way forward, and I can honestly say I don’t know if we would be where we are today without her. Thank You from the bottom of my heart for seeing it through with us. ​Henry

Thought provoking

Anika’s coaching has helped me in so many situations with her thought-provoking insights and analyses. She's a great listener and the ideal conversation partner when it comes to organizing my thoughts and deriving possible courses of action. She's incredibly well-read and experienced on topics related to interpersonal relationships and always has a book or audiobook recommendation at hand. I could always be assured that our conversations would remain completely confidential – a prerequisite for opening up without fear. I can wholeheartedly recommend Anika as a coach! Ricarda

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